By: Cliff Rieders
CAR: So, Kaila, you are about to give birth. Your due date is tomorrow, March 3rd, and you have been in Israel for how many years now?
Kaila: I’m in Israel for 7 years.
CAR: 7 years, and you’ve gone from being a recent college graduate to a married woman to almost, very soon to be, a mother. I think what most people are interested in, and what I am interested in, is what about your background brought you to where you are today? This journey over the last 6 years?
Kaila: Well, I think that life is a – on one hand it’s the decisions that we make and it also is the circumstances that happen to us. So I guess a combination of both. I came here when I was 21 years old. I was very young and inspired by Israel and by what people were doing here and I followed my heart. Some things worked out, some things didn’t; but eventually the things that I chose led me to the place that I am and I’m very happy where I am.
CAR: When you first came here, you came like a lot of young people do who were either not finished with college, are finished with college, to a specific program. What was that program and why that particular program? What was the program that brought you here when you finished college?
Kaila: I came here on a Jewish seminary, like to learn Jewish law. I came here to learn in a seminary and for Jewish girls.
CAR: Do you think you were that religious at the time? Was it the religiosity that brought you to Mayanot or what attracted you to –
Kaila: You don’t need to be religious in order to learn religion. It’s a person who is interested in learning, maybe more about where they come from in order to get a better insight into life or their life or circumstances whatever it may be; but I would say that I was like middle of the road, but I really wanted to come because I felt like when I graduated from university that I had a very good academic background and I was lacking a Jewish background, which is a lot of things that I didn’t know, I didn’t understand. I thought as a young Jewish person that I had to just learn more about those things and I had the time and I was in the right place to do so, so I went for it.
CAR: When you finished Mayanot, it was almost right after that that you made Aliyah, correct?
Kaila: Yes.
CAR: I think it is also important to mention that you came here without immediate – you had relatives in Israel but without immediate family. A lot of people come here they have a parent or parents who are Israelis or living here; you came without anybody and you made Aliyah after a year. Was that scary not having immediate family here?
Kaila: When you say I have family, I had family but I had never met them before and they don’t speak English; so when I came here, I didn’t know Hebrew, and even though there was family that existed in this part of the world, I wasn’t close to them and I couldn’t speak to them. Once I did learn Hebrew a little bit, things became a lot easier and they cared for me, I became closer to them, I developed a relationship. But, coming here is very difficult without family, especially at a very young age. And if you are not serious and determined to do something with your life, you can fall between the cracks and you can get lost.
And I think that’s something that my Dad always told me is that, no matter where you are and no matter what you’re doing, it’s always going to be difficult because it’s always something new. And whether you’re in America or you’re in Israel or wherever you may be, these are the stages of growing up that you have to learn and you can’t give up because something’s difficult. You have to persevere and you have to get help and you have to ask questions and just figure out what you want to do with your life. Because it’s going to happen here, there, anywhere.
CAR: When you formally decided to make Aliyah after a year, at that time had you already decided you were going to do the Army or where did that all come in – Aliyah and the Army?
Kaila: I really wanted to go into the Army, but I was already like 22 I think at that point and the Army’s minimum draft age, I believe, is 18. So for me to go into the Army was sort of like an inconvenience for them, but once I decided that it was something that I wanted to do I really persevered; I didn’t give up. There was a lot of times when I just didn’t hear back from them, they had no idea who I was, every time I would call they would pretend they don’t know what’s going on with my case, they never heard of me, every time it was the same story, a different story, a new story. Eventually, I just didn’t give up and I just insisted that I talk to a high-ranking officer in the recruitment office who could actually help me. And I think like a week before I got drafted, they told me to pack my bag and I’m going to Michve Alon, which is a special place for people who come from abroad.
CAR: You didn’t go in on some American program, I mean you got drafted as an Israeli because you had made Aliyah, correct?
Kaila: Well, we all get drafted the same way, it’s just a matter of if you have support. You can do a program which offers support on the weekends or for things that you might need throughout your service or whatever. I didn’t have that, no. But I did go to Michve Alon, which is a base designated for new immigrants to this country, not just Americans – immigrants from all over the world – from Russia, the United States, Ethiopia. And they have special programs that help integrate people into Israeli culture and to learn Hebrew and to just be a little bit more sensitive that your situation is not like the average Israeli 18-year-old.
CAR: To a lot of people reading this, they could understand coming here for an education. They could even understand maybe making Aliyah. I think a lot of people would have difficulty with the concept of being here alone and joining the Army as a lone soldier. I know there are other lone soldiers obviously, but it’s probably the exception and not the rule. Again, what was your motivation for wanting specifically to serve in the Army?
Kaila: Contrary to popular belief, there are a lot of lone soldiers in Israel and not just Americans or foreigners; there are a lot of Israeli lone soldiers. A lone soldier is defined as anybody who is not connected to their immediate family, their parents, they don’t have support. Parents who also can’t also support their children necessarily are considered lone soldiers. It’s an incentive that the government provides in order to help people survive a little bit easier during their service. And I actually think, again, contrary to popular belief, that being a soldier, looking back on things, is much easier than living in the real world because even though it might be difficult physically or emotionally at certain points, everything is taken care of; your housing, your living, your food, pretty much everything. It’s really when you finish the Army and you go into the real world and you have to figure out how you’re actually going to survive and what you’re going to do that the challenges really begin.
CAR: That’s a very good point. When you were in the Army, again, as a lone soldier, did you have any fears, you obviously did basic training like everybody else; was it a fearful experience? A positive experience for you, overall?
Kaila: The Army was great. I learned so much about myself, I learned about Israel, I made a lot of friends, and it was a great learning experience. I learned a lot about Israeli culture, and I’m very thankful for the time that I had there.
CAR: Then after the Army, did you consider – did they want you to stay, by the way? Were you ever approached that this might be something you would consider doing on a more long-term basis?
Kaila: Yes, to be an officer is something that is available to soldiers who more or less take their job seriously. I thought about it, I considered it, but it’s a long road, it’s a long process and I really wanted to – I felt that it was time to move on with my life, but I think that being an officer is a great opportunity. Maybe if I was a bit younger I could have done it or I could have seen myself doing it.
CAR: How are women treated in the Army? Americans who read this, and those of us who were drafted or served, have a particular view and I think still today of women in the Army. What was it like being a woman specifically in the Army? Obviously there were women officers, and I think the base commander at Michve Alon may have been a woman. But did you have any insight about that that would be useful for Americans to know?
Kaila: Women are very highly respected in the Israeli Army. They are given jobs of prestigious positions. They are in charge of shooting instructions, in charge of teaching soldiers, teaching combat soldiers how to jump out of airplanes, how to – what’s it called – to, like, physical activity, sports, all that type of stuff, they are the ones that have to train the soldiers to do everything and anything in this country. Very difficult jobs in terms of like surveillance are a lot of jobs that women will get into. There are women combat soldiers as well, women who work with dogs, women who do everything; border patrol, I mean any job there is in the Army, more or less, women have access to it. And they are taken seriously with respect obviously, I don’t think it depends as much on your gender as on your ability to be able to do the job.
CAR: Did you ever have any fearful times in the Army? Did you ever feel fear?
Kaila: One time, we were sleeping in the field and my friend got up from her sleeping bag, dumped out her sleeping bag and a black scorpion crawled out of it, crossed my sleeping bag. That was sort of frightening.
CAR: After the Army, you decided to go to law school. What motivated you to do that?
Kaila: I should say what my job was in the Army. I was in Sar Lel. That is an organization that the Army has, which started from the first Lebanon war where volunteers would come to Israel to help out in the field because all of those reserve soldiers had to go to fight for the country. So the fields were empty, and as the country was growing it was really crucial that people came here to stimulate and develop the land. We have this organization today where, instead of going to the land the volunteers come and they work on the bases. And it’s super inspiring, there’s incredible people that come to do this program. You can come for 1, 2 or 3 weeks, any age, any race, any religion. Anything you want to do, as long as you want to help Israel and believe in the Army. So, this was my job, to take people around to the bases and they do work, whatever the base needs, and you teach them about Israel and you basically put on the whole Army experience for them. What was the question?
CAR: The question is, why law school?
Kaila: Oh. So when I finished my service I really thought I was going to go into fundraising or something like this to help Israel. And I was working in a job that was American hours at nighttime and it was really not suited for me – I was not happy there. And I said to myself, this is not my life calling; I need to figure out what I’m going to do with my life. And, law school was always something that I had been interested in and I thought about. Obviously, my family is very well connected with law, but in Israel law is something you have to learn in Hebrew and I was very hesitant in my ability, questioning my ability to be able to do that. And I went online and did some research and I found this school where you can learn half in English and half in Hebrew, so I thought maybe this could be appropriate for me. During the time of the English studies, I could really improve my Hebrew, etc. etc. So, I went to the school to check things out, and I really liked it there and I really liked the people and I thought that this is something that I could see myself doing and I went for it.
CAR: So, now you’ve been in the school 3 years plus your internship; has it been difficult?
Kaila: Extremely difficult. There has been a lot of challenges along the way. The school itself was very challenging. I enjoyed learning a lot, I enjoyed my classes. The Hebrew was definitely – I was definitely in over my head, no other way to say it. But, it was a struggle that’s for sure. Half the people don’t make it. I don’t know if it’s because they just don’t want to put in the time or the effort or they just – I don’t know – but it was definitely not easy. I guess looking back now, I can say that I’m so happy that I finished, that I did it, because I learned so much and I learned how to overcome struggles and all those good things, but it’s definitely not easy; definitely not easy.
CAR: Now that you’ve finished you’re last exam in Hebrew and you’re about to finish your internship, the next hurdle is the bar exam, correct?
Kaila: Yes.
CAR: So, do you want to stay in Israel?
Kaila: I do want to stay in Israel. I think that life throws us challenges that we don’t know necessarily how we’re going to deal with it or what’s going to happen, so we have to keep an open mind; I worked really hard to get here, I worked really hard to stay here, and I would love to have my life here. I think that it’s a great place, it’s a great country, and I can’t really see myself going back to America or anywhere else.
CAR: What is your message to parents of young people maybe in college who are considering coming to Israel to study, to live, to learn? A lot of parents, as you know, you said this, are not supportive of their kids making Aliyah, unless they’re doing it themselves. What is your message to – let’s start out with parents of Jewish kids in America?
Kaila: I think that parents, Jewish parents, who instill values of love of Judaism and love of Israel and then say that they don’t respect or they don’t allow their children to go to Israel to whatever it may be, fulfill their dreams, to accomplish something, is very hypocritical because it’s taught in our religion and you are specifically teaching to your children to love Israel and to be supporters of Israel, yet when a kid decides to actually follow your advice and your dreams, a parent does not handle it. I think that you need to give your kid the tools in order to succeed in life and in order to succeed in whatever it is that they may do and the choices that they make. That’s between parents and their children. But if you respect your kids and you feel that they can succeed, then you have to let them live.
CAR: What do you have to say to the young people who may be where you were when you finished college? They’re thinking about Israel, maybe they like the politics here, maybe they don’t, blah blah blah. They’re not sure what they want to do but they have some interest in maybe giving it a shot or seeing what it’s like to study here. What do you have to say to the young Jewish kids who are in college in America today?
Kaila: That you have to have a plan and you have to work towards that plan. You can’t be discouraged because things get difficult, because it is going to be difficult no matter where you are. Obviously, it’s more difficult – mom and dad aren’t here; but Israel is family and people are willing to help and you can succeed in whatever you may do. I know people who are in the same position as me, come from worse situations, they don’t have any support, maybe financial support or anything at all, but they succeed in what they do because of their personalities and because of their drive to work hard. Just because something may be a challenge doesn’t mean that you can give up
so easily, but you have to know what you’re going to do and how you’re going to do it and strive towards it. You have to learn Hebrew, also.
CAR: Yasher Koach to you, and Chazak Ve’ematz. You have done a phenomenal job and we all love you and respect you and you should go from strength to strength and only good things for you and your family forever.
Kaila: Thank you.
CAR: Amen.
Kaila: Amen. Thanks.
